Cross-Generational Trauma in The Waiting

The Waiting by Keum Suk Gendry-Kim is a beautifully drawn graphic novel that tells the story of a young woman who accidentally ends up on the opposite side of the 39th parallel from her husband and young son. What I found most striking was not the extremely painful account of Song Gwija's panic and desperation as she realizes that she has lost her family forever, but the way the book shows the lingering aftereffects of this trauma. The Waiting moves between the present day, as Song Gwija's daughter grapples with her now-elderly mother's past, and the Korean War, as Song Gwija fights for her safety and dignity. Keum Suk Gendry-Kim makes clear that Song Gwija is far from the only woman grappling with this immense loss-- her close friend has lost a sister across the DMZ. Eventually she marries a man who lost his wife, and they agree that if their respective spouses are ever found, they will amicably separate.

So much of Song Gwija's actions after the war, especially as a mother, are difficult to understand for her children. She favors her second husband's son, who is the same age as her own lost little boy, and hoards socks and underwear. She hopes to one day see her child again, and wonders if she will recognize him after decades. 

I think this book could be an incredible resource not only for teaching Korean history and culture, but incorporating SEL into the classroom. We meet Song Gwija as a eccentric old woman who frustrates her daughter, and, as we learn her story, are eventually overwhelmed with the heroism she displayed just staying alive. Though she does build a life for herself in South Korea, it is clear that her trauma is always present. She does not "overcome" what happened to her but learns to live with it, never giving up hope that she will see her loved ones again. What a great way to help students understand trauma and build empathy for others!

I plan to use this as a option for sophomores to use for a research project. It works especially well for this assignment because it ends with a class to action-- SO many Koreans are in the same position as Song Gwija and unfortunately, this population is elderly and cannot afford to waste any time if they are to reunite with their loved ones. I think this would be a great jumping off point for students to think about solutions: Why can't Song Gwija see her husband and son again? Especially decades later? What would be have to be put into place to facilitate a reunion? These questions will, I hope, lead to rich analysis.